8:17 a.m. - Thurs. June 2, 2005
Woes....
Change is so very very hard. I know I�ve said that everything is a state of mind and anything is possible with the right state of mind, however my state must be faulty or something because I want to change I want to have a neat house I want to keep busy and clean and be like those who get things done and have beautiful neat homes and such. I know that only I have the power and only I can do it. I just can�t seem to do it. So I need to do one thing or the other. Either put up or shut up Eh?? I am proud of myself this morning I got up got a load of towels and socks in the wash that I used on the dog yesterday and sorted the clothes in my room that were all over that need washed. The next big thing to do in there is to pack away the winter things, and hang everything else up and sort through my top dresser drawer for garbage **ie. Nylons with holes and the like** I should be able to at least put my pants or my t-shirts in there with my socks and undies. That is a lot to do with all the hair on the book today but I do want to see if I can get something done. I want to be proud of myself and the last few days have found me not getting anything done.
Speaking of yesterday I spend most of it either at the vet�s office or waiting to go back to the vet�s office. Poor Nitey, she has this horrible stuff on her nose and I have tried and tried and it just isn�t getting any better so have discussed doing a biopsy the last time I was in, I was believing that we needed to do something, so to the vet we went yesterday. After discussing the alternatives which I didn�t like, the treatment for what we are thinking it is will take long term meds which could of course harm her liver and such, so doing the biopsy and finding out just what it is exactly we are dealing with was a good idea. This biopsy cost me $237.00 and this isn�t with any treatment it is just to find out what is wrong. The vet said depending on what it is there is a good chance that she will need about that much again in meds by the time the whole thing is said and done. This is such a bummer, it means that something I wanted to do this summer won�t happen because we decided that the income tax money was for doing fun things that Kay wanted to do with her last summer and we always let Paul pick something to do too. We also need to get some work done on the back porch, it didn�t get finished last year and we still have quite a bit to do on it, we also noticed the other night that the little deck out front will need work this year, even though we used treated wood we noticed some rot and with my fear of falling though things like that I won�t let it go!! Now that I know it is there. We were just actually looking to see if I stained the underneath which I did but it must hold water there or something. There is so much to be done out there and I haven�t a clue how to begin.
Well I do have a decent day in the shop today and tomorrow which I find makes me really happy. HAHA I need the money. I don�t regret my decision of leaving when that job went full time. I did ask the vets office if they needed anyone on a part time basis. I like the vets there and they work the hours I like. I don�t think that would be bad. They told me to bring in my resume so I might just work on that today. I wish I could find the email for the photography place that offered me a job. Just to check into it.
Well I am thoroughly depressing myself.. ** ok not really** and nothing will get done if I sit here too long, the only thing that will happen is I blow away the extra time I gained by getting up early!
Always remember and never forget�when taking the dog to the vet it is a great idea to cover the seats she will be sitting in for the ride home� pppeeeee youuuuuuu!!
