1:45 p.m. - Thurs. Sept. 30, 2004
Better but still drowing...
I have to say I have many things to be happy for this afternoon. To name a few, I have lemon jello in my fridge which will be set in a couple hours, I have this cold/flu/sinus stuff on the run I do believe, I also heard from a friend I was so delighted to talk to I can�t begin to say. This friend means very much to me as I enjoy her company and her insightfulness and her ability to be a good friend. I had worried that we hadn�t been in touch much that she sorta didn�t think of me and whatnot **I�m sorta insecure that way** but here she was just doing her thing, which is terrific! Anyhow we spent some wonderful time talking on the phone which was good cause it kept me from doing anything, which is good since I�m on the mend but not totally better. I still feel like I am drowning! My throat is somewhat sore so I believe that the nasty sinus stuff is draining and will soon be done! YAY!!! I�m sure you all were just waiting with bated breath to hear that. Haha.
I am in such a great mood today, mostly due to my friend�s phone call and feeling better. NOW!! I am going to explain why some of my recent entries have taken on a negative or not happy tone. I tend to get this way when I worry! I was fretting over stuff that was stupid to fret over, and now that everything seems to have worked out for the very best I need to learn from this. ***I am thinking I probably won�t but�.????****
I was standing in the shower and the thoughts and ideas that I wanted to write about were rushing around like leaves on a busy stream. One of those that I can remember was an observance, I have come to the conclusion that I do learn from some of my past experiences. I realize I was in a situation that was almost the same as one I had gotten myself in to a few years ago, however this time I looked for the opportunities and found them. This also allowed me to not walk away from everything about the situation both the good and the bad. I also realized that Eleanor Roosevelt was right when she said, �people can only make you feel inferior if you let them.� **ok I�m not entirely sure those are her exact words but close.** This also applies to people can only hurt you if you let them, people can only goad you into doing something you don�t want to if you let them. I have always told my kids these thing but alas I think I have fallen victim to the whole giving advice but not taking the advice. I have finally done that and you know it is a very empowering feeling. When all is said and done my actions will speak louder than words and I am hoping that when people remember me they will remember the good I tried to do because of this story��.
One day a man was walking down the beach and came upon a young man throwing star fish that has been left behind by the tide back into the ocean. The man said to the boy, why are you throwing those starfish back into the ocean, you can�t begin to save them all the beach is almost covered with them. To which the young man replied, I may not have an impact on them all but to this one and he threw another on into the ocean, but to this one I made a difference.
This isn�t exactly the same wording as it was told to me many years ago but the idea is the same. It doesn�t matter if I impact the whole world but I can impact those around me, and just as a pebble thrown into the water makes ripples maybe someday someone that I have touched will touch someone who can change the world. I�m not Mother Theresa of Calcutta but I believe if more people tried to make a difference it would be made! So I am very happy that as with the cheerleader mother�s I didn�t buy into their negativity and whatnot. I may not have made a difference there however I am hoping that I did plant a seed of positivity *I think I made that word up and I like it* in them that might grow, and if it doesn�t I�ll just keep being me and maybe one day.
Well that is far more than enough of my own horn blowing for one day! I have been thinking of the scrapbooks I want to make the cheerleaders on my daughters squad. I am not sure how big or little of how I want them to be. OYYY,,, I went and bought a bunch of paper. About $10 in paper, and I was sorta thinking I would like to get a start on them even though I don�t have the photos done yet, however I�m not sure when the football banquet is so I don�t know when my deadline is. This is a sort of conundrum as I am not sure if I want to get started on them now or if I should wait till after the crop on the 16th of Oct. where I might get better ideas. HUMMMM!!! The procrastinator part of me says� OHH wait wiat,,, but the other part of me who knows the procrastinator tooo well says,,, ahh duh.. you know that procrastinator part will let you wait till you don�t have the time and will make you absolutely crazy and then you may not even follow through with it. Soooo you should get at this as soon as possible. **I am hoping that this doesn�t sound like I�m talking to myself.**
I am so happy to be feeling better however I still have this nasty pressure headache and my neck still hurts so I think I am going to take some Tylenol and head off to take a nice nap, all this thinking and horn blowing sure has made me tired.
Always remember and never forget�one can�t be eating if one is napping�
